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JAGUARS OWNER PROMISES TO LEAD TEAM TO MUSHROOM KINGDOM

In his interview on the Today Show with Matt Lauer Jaguars owner, Shad Khan promised to take the poorly performing NFL team “all the way to the Mushroom Kingdom…oops, I mean Super Bowl next year.”

Matt Lauer then said, “Did you just say the Mushroom Kingdom?”

Khan quickly defended himself and said, “No! Haha, of course not! It was, uh, just a joke. I am Shad Khan, a Pakistani-American businessman. I only have interests in the NFL. I do not talk about this silly Mushroom Kingdom. And I do not plan to use Jaguars running back Maurice Jones-Drew to charge an athletic attack against a tyrant fire-breathing monster who has stolen the love of my life.”

As Lauer then asked Khan why he was acting so weird Khan’s taller brother then hit Lauer with a turtle shell, leaving Lauer was on the floor bleeding while the brothers jumped away to safety.

All photos and content used by Milk the Bull meet all legal and copyright approval. All characters, stories, items and situations on this site, even those based on real people, are entirely fictional.
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All photos and content used by Milk the Bull meet all legal and copyright approval. All characters, stories and situations on this editorial/satire site, even those based on real people, are entirely fictional.
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