“Why run for one office, when you can furnish all offices in the world?” said Romney as he declined the republican nomination to take on the position of director of national sales at Office Max.
“You worried about creating jobs? Well how about the job of printer repair guy? I opened up ten new positions in our Wyoming region alone,” said Romney, “You want free healthcare? Well I’ve got Band-Aids at 20% off on aisle twelve. Prices so good that they might as well be free.”
“Sure Barack Obama might have another four years at being an exceptional president, but when he runs out of Scotch tape, who do you think he’s going to come to?” said Romney, “Not FedEx Kinkos, that’s for damn sure.”