Following the NRA’s comments that teachers need to be armed with guns, NRA Executive Vice President Wayne LaPierre decided to comment on how to best stop rape, “It’s common sense. The only way to fight fire, is with more fire. If we preemptively rape the rapists, then there will be no more rapes. Get it?”
“No, we don’t get it,” said everyone in the room.
“You guys are just so stupid. It’s plain and simple,” said LaPierre, “Just use whatever is causing the problem and make more of it to attack it.”
“We still don’t see how that will work,” said everyone in the room.
“Guys, listen, it’s like fighting fire with fire. Pretty simple stuff,” said LaPierre, “Which brings us to my other our other idea: all fire stations should have gasoline trucks, to spray on the fire instead of water. If we literally attack fire with fire, then the fire will never see it coming. Then we win! Plain and simple. Just keep doing the same thing, and more of it, which will definitely solve the problem, even though it’s the exact same thing.”