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“This will be the best library in the world,” said former president George W. Bush, “It’s going to be like Disney World and a monster truck rally at the same time. We’ve got tons of DVDs and fancy computers with Facebook capabilities. You can play Farmville and listen to Lady Gaga at the same time.”

Bush continued, “The third floor is strictly for higher education books, such as literature books for 9th and 10th graders. Not too many pictures in those so the only time I go up there is to get a PayDay candy bar from the vending machine. Sometimes I get my hand stuck in the flap trying to swipe a Snickers from the bottom row.”

“We also have Harry Potter books, which is kinda silly cause we have Harry Potter on Blu-Ray. The librarian lady said we need to have more books, so I just said, ‘okay, I trust your judgment. You’ve been reading for about 20-30 years now which is longer than I’ve been able to read I’m only turning 67 this year.”

When asked about the omission of all history books that reference 2000 to 2008, Bush replied, “uh…well, um….I’m not sure where those books all went. But let’s not worry about that. Did you see that we have the entire series of Dexter on Blu Ray? How rad is that!”

The George W. Bush Presidential Library and Museum sets a record as being the only library strategically located across the street from a Dairy Queen and a Dave and Buster’s Arcade.



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